Animas Lunch Report – 9/8/15 – Grammar Assassins

Do you know any grammar assassins?

“What is a grammar assassin?” you may ask. A grammar assassin (much like a real life assassin), is someone who lies in wait, biding their time, awaiting the ideal moment to strike. Once you make that fatal [grammar] mistake, the grammar assassins moves in with lightning quick speed, issuing forth a flurry of deathblows to end your pride. Despite the greatness of your Facebook post, e-mail, or Livejournal entry; the grammar assassin cares not. Grammar assassins do not discriminate; they would sling throwing stars of correction at Abe Lincoln or MLK should their most famous of speeches contain any grammatical flaws. No one is safe from grammar assassins…

Which is why I was feeling a little down after our recent newsletter was sent out last week. As soon as the newsletter hit our subscriber’s inboxes, I was pelted with .50 cal corrections from grammar assassins all over. It seems these ninjas were ready.

Ok, so I’ll admit I wasn’t at peak grammar efficiency. Maybe I was running around trying to complete a litany of other tasks unrelated to grammar-assassin-defense. Maybe I was over-caffeinated from one too many cups of coffee. At least I got the newsletter out, right? At least I bestowed upon the masses of Duranglers’ e-mail subscribers the knowledge that we are currently running fall float trips on the Rio Grande River (streamer junkies take note), right? At least shop followers now know to get after the pike bite…right?

I tell myself these things, but I still felt wounded from numerous grammar nunchuck strikes to my dome. Thankfully, it was only my pride that was wounded. Fortunately there is something that can cure (or destroy) wounded pride: fly fishing.

So I did just that. I got up for a dawn patrol mission on the Animas river, and put one fatty 14″ brown in hand hucking streamers. Unfortunately no takers on the mouse, but I still have hope that somewhere lurking in the depths of The River of Lost Souls; a mouse-hating, kype-jaw wearing, ugly SOB brown trout lies sulking, just waiting to destroy any rodent that passes within his comfort zone of 20 feet. (how’s that for grammar?)

The wonder of fly fishing. I felt my grammar problems flow away with the current. Hack authors have made a career writing about this phenomenon…

If you came to this post, looking for an actual “fishing report”…well I suppose we can accommodate you too.

The Animas is still a little off color below Lightner Creek from recent rains. Currently dropping, and just under 400 cfs; the river is still a little warm mid-day. Good hatches of midges and baetis are going off that many fish are keying in on. It seems mornings until about 11ish are seeing the biggest fish caught. If you are not seeing any risers or emerger eaters, put on some weight and fish deep with an attractor nymph followed by a smaller (18-20) baetis nymph. Bigger browns are moving, so streamers are a good option. Oh yeah, fish hoppers too.

There are also a lot of really good fish being caught on the San Juan River. Spencer put one of his recent clients into this haus bow the other day. As always, small midges and baetis are taking fish on the Juan. Spaghetti and Meatballs (eggs and SJ worms) are worth tying on if nothing else seems to work. You could also just be the hero we need right now and huck streamers on the San Juan; 99% of anglers not doing it. Be the 1%.